TALK WISDOM - EPISDODE 7

You are warmly invited to join us for Episode 7 of our pilot season of Talk Wisdom. This week we're going to talk about something so many of us experience or are heading towards - Burnout. How do you recognize the tipping point between lacking energy and passion and a fully fledged energy crisis? What simple changes can you make to get off the 'Go Go Go Crash' train and get on the 'Nourish, Grow, Bloom' train? We'll be sharing a simple 5 minute assessment so you can see where you're at and identify your personal focus areas.

Thanks everyone for joining us, I loved hanging out :-). Here's a link to the 'Do you have the energy to lead your life' assessment' We'll send you an email so you can keep it :-). www.lifedesignlab.live/energy

 
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TALK WISDOM - EPISODE 6

We talked about something we're pretty sure every single one of us knows something about: Fear. There's true fear (the kind that warns us of a genuine threat)) and false fear (the kind that's based more in our imagination than in reality). How do you discern whether your fear is healthy and appropriate or whether it's working hard to keep you small and block you from being more of who you really are? What's your experience with fear and what do you do to overcome or counteract it?

 
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TALK WISDOM - EPISODE 3

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Another amazing conversation about Self Care Part 2.

We experienced a glitch and couldn’t download the video properly so the audio please listen to the Audio above. Enjoy!

 
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TALK WISDOM - EPISODE 2

I love this episdoe, it is full of vibrant conversation and insights about self care.

The downside is we had a glitch and couldn’t download it properly so the audio is not ideal but the content is great.

Enjoy!

Are you interested in watching TALK WISDOM LIVE? We host it in the below FB group. Click the image to join:

 
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TALK WISDOM SHOW - PILOT EPISODE

It didn’t seem possible that I would be co-hosting a show. The idea seemed reserved only for those who were ‘discovered’ by media networks. I feel grateful that technology now allows anyone who has a dream and a message to have a chance to share it. I am pretty excited to be part of this with two other women (Morna Haist & Annie Pringle) whom I admire greatly.

We created this special show to talk about our inner worlds - what matters to us, what holds us back and how we can support each other in community.

This is episode one of Season One. I hope you enjoy it.

Are you interested in watching TALK WISDOM LIVE? We host it in the below FB group. Click the image to join:

Mistakes are beautiful

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Likely when we make a mistake as an adult we tend to beat ourselves up. Our inner critic takes over and we bully and shame ourselves. Today, my daughter taught me a valuable lesson about making mistakes. 

I asked her to paint me a welcome rock for our front door. When she finished her artistic creation, she called me over excited to share it. I noticed the beautiful colors and I asked her to tell me about the happy face.

"The first M didn't work out so I put m and e above and made a happy face." She said matter of factly.

That was the end of it. There was no bashing herself about the fact that her creation is ruined, or that she sucks at painting or that she should have planned out the letters better... blah blah blah.

She was thrilled there was now a happy face to welcome people. I stood there reflecting on how wise she is and how we all could take a lesson from her. 

Let's allow our mistakes because they open up the possibility of beauty that would not have been there otherwise.

Mistakes are beautiful just like this painted rock with the M that became a happy face. 

Bye for now!

Kim

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One ring at a time

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What we focus on grows, and current research supports it.  Our brain creates new neural connections with each thought and our thoughts serve as the foundation for our actions. Our thoughts create our reality, we have all heard this before.

One thing I don't think many people are talking about is the speed of our growth. I feel like there is a bit of impatience and frustration surrounding us.  Just because we live in a time where information is on a superhighway doesn't mean our growth has to expand at the speed of light or sound. I think the statement may be more powerful like this:

What we focus on and take our time with grows.

I love trees. I think they are a beautiful metaphor for human experience. I like to think that our growth as people is like a tree. One exceptional ring at a time, rich with experiences and learning.

My invitation is to imagine you are a tree. Appreciate the rings you have already created and trust that more are coming. Stay in the moment and focus on moving forward with slow, focused attention and intention.

Bye for now,

Kim

4 ingredients to personal growth

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I just came in from outside. I am exhausted but in a good way. 

I was transplanting trees and as the sun was going down it occurred to me that our own growth and development is similar to transplanting a tree. We need certain ingredients in order to flourish into the best versions of ourselves.

Here are my 4 essential ingredients for personal growth inspired by my tree day. 

1) Curiosity

We have a choice in life. We can wake up every day and do our best to experience the same things and think the same way or we can be curious and explore new experiences and ways of living. Without this willingness to be curious, we will not grow. Yawn.

2) Honesty

You may not want to admit it but the only way to grow is to get honest with yourself and push the limits of your comfort zone. It is crucial to stretch ourselves and the only way to do this is to face reality head-on and take risks. 

3) Effort

Nobody said growing was going to be easy! It takes commitment, energy, and effort. In my opinion, the effort is well worth it because the rewards of learning feel so good. Who doesn't LOVE a light bulb moment? 

4) Time

Just like effort, growing takes time. The spruce trees I planted today can live up to 200 years!!! They grow slow and so let's take a lesson from this. We don't have to grow fast, slow down and enjoy the journey! AND remember to take the time for your growth. 

When we put all 4 of these ingredients together we get to experience awareness as our reward. Just like the rings of a tree, our awareness keeps moving outward... I love growth. 

Bye for now!

Kim

S L O W - D O W N . . .

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Why the heck do I have a snail taped inside my cell phone case? Well, to make a very long story short actual snails and the image of snails have been showing up for me this month. It may seem like a coincidence to some, but for me, it is a clear sign that I am supposed to pay attention to slowing down.

What does the snail represent for me? Simply, SLOW, which by definition means not quick. I had to ask myself some tough questions since the snail seemed to be always there. Where? Well, I found one on a garbage lid in a park,  a deck of cards I happened to be using one day had snail shells on them, my daughter's board game card (seen above) seemed to be left in different places in my house which I found 'randomly' throughout the month.

Ok, back to the honest questions I had to ask myself - what does it mean to be snail-like in my life? Yikes, I guess I haven't been. I started this business in 2015 determined to make it work and here we are in 2018 and a LOT has happened both professionally and personally. If I am honest, I wouldn't describe life right now as SLOW and it is quite clear I need to make some shifts if I am going to BE the person I strive so hard to BE.

So, I am back to the same question. What does it mean to be snail-like in my life? The answers have been slowly surfacing this week.

Here are my top 3 insights I have discovered:

1) Define SLOW

For those who have gone for a walk with me know that that my body is slow. I am a stroller by nature and often take my time physically. What I have noticed is my mind is not SLOW and therefore this is where the shift is required. My mind is like a rabbit. I am constantly thinking, feeling, analyzing, creating, puzzling... For me, slow means allowing my mind to rest and just BE. 

I have decided to adopt a snail's mind lately - a conscious presence of the current moment. I realized that if my mind is not slow, I am not present and therefore I cannot access joy. hmm, I don't want that. I want more joy!

2) Do one thing at a time

This is connected to the rabbit mind... go, go, go. I have noticed that when I focus on what I am doing and make a conscious decision to do one thing in presence I feel so much better, less stressed and more joyful. Tip - give yourself double the amount of time you think it is going to take you.

I have also decided to schedule less and I am loving it.

3) The bullseye question

This question popped into my head one day when the rabbit was running away with my many thoughts. Kim, what are you missing right now by not being slow and present?

Ah crap, I was with my kids and instead of engaging with them I was in my head. This is not who I want to be. This question brought me back to slow and I continue to ask it when I feel the rabbit running around me trying to pressure me to get going and go, go, go.

I don't want to miss a thing! What is more important than the present moment? I was stumped, are you?

My hope is that this helps you to look at your own experience and what slowing down would mean for your life. 

This is why I taped the board game card into my phone, to remind me not only to slow down but that the faster I go the more I risk missing.

Bye for now,

Kim

Two doors

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Fearing vulnerability is a belief system we have adopted as truth. We think that vulnerability equals risking our survival. When we take a moment and reflect on this doesn't it seem a bit ridiculous? 

This is what I have discovered since exploring vulnerability this month. This belief doesn't fit or work for me anymore and I hope after you read this it doesn't fit for you either. 

This is how I look at it. When we are at the vulnerability crossroads what appears in front of us are two doors (figurately, of course). One door leads us to the land of EMBRACE and one door leads us to the land of RESIST.

There is of course choice at every crossroads and behind each door. The beauty of this is I am not going to tell you what door is which. You get to decide that too. Who am I to define that right is resist or left is embrace or vise-versa. I did the work to figure out my doors and I now invite you to do the same. 

What is true for me is that when I am completely open to vulnerability, I live fully.

Vulnerability is life and life is vulnerability.

I think it is worth the risk even if my brain and body believe I may risk dying. I have survived it all so far! I have created a new belief that vulnerability is not scary. Vulnerability is where beauty and connection live. This is a place I want to spend more time in.

Embrace or resist the choice is yours.

What door will you choose?

Bye for now, 

Kim

 

Vulnerability week 3...

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I have been exploring vulnerability this March and I have learned two important things;
 

1) Stepping into vulnerability is only something to fear if we think there is something to fear. I am not afraid anymore of being vulnerable because it actually feels really good. 

2) Everyone feels similar things especially around being vulnerable so I think it is time to just 'bungee jump' into it because the reality is we are all screaming with fear and excitement on this journey of life.

My kind of math ... vulnerability math!

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I like to keep things simple. Could I write paragraphs and paragraphs about how courage and vulnerability shows up in our lives? Of course, but why when 5 simple equations will make the point.

Equation #1

Courage + Vulnerability = Deep Connection with those that matter.

Equation #2

Courage + Vulnerability = passion for what matters

Equation #3

Courage + Vulnerability = Fully experiencing moments that matter

Equation #4

Courage + Vulnerability = Fully expressing who we are at our core

Equation #5

Courage + Vulnerability = Being true to who we are

Will there be risk? Yes, there will always be risk because:

Risk = Judgement from those who DON'T matter.

We need to ask ourselves... is having the courage to be vulnerable worth the risk?

Heck ya! The cost of not taking this risk is way too high.

With love, Kim

One more thing about Self Care

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In order to create a balance of self care in our life it is crucial we invest time exploring and getting clear on what self care looks like in our life and what result we are intending to create.

It is easier to go the grocery store with a plan and a list then just showing up at the doors and hoping you get everything you need. Self care is exactly the same.

Here is a simple template you can use to help with this clarity...

Enjoy!

Make self care a priority with 5 simple mindsets

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Self care is one of my favorite topics because in my experience working with women it feels hard for them to take this crucial time for themselves. It seems they are weighed down with guilt, unworthiness, to do lists and expectations from others.

Sometimes all it takes is a simple mindset to put the importance of self care into perspective.

Here are 5 mindsets to consider if you feel weighed down by taking time for yourself:

1) Self love and self care is not selfish

Let's cut the word selfish from the dictionary. It has infiltrated our culture as a description for taking time for ourselves. It just isn't true. We NEED this time just as much as we NEED food and water to survive.

2) Vehicles need fuel and maintenance

We spend much time and money taking care of our cars and trucks to ensure they run efficiently and last a long time. Our bodies are a vehicle so let's give them the same care and attention. Here is the thing - if we don't have fuel, we don't run.

3) You breathe, you deserve

I often wonder who made up the deserving score card for self care... some people feel like they have to do certain things in life to deserve time for themselves. Let's scrap that belief and replace it with this one - If you breathe in and out, you deserve time for yourself. PERIOD!

4) Know what you need

One of the most crucial parts of self care is understanding what you need for fuel. It took me some time but I finally figured out that I need alone time to recharge. Even 5-10 minutes helps me get centered. I invite every one to get clear on what you need and then tell people WHY you need it. This will help with any backlash or feelings of wonder from family and friends. We are all unique so it makes sense that our self care regime will be as well.

5) Guilt is not an option

Feeling guilty for taking time and caring for yourself was not something you came up with on your own. It came from somewhere so therefore you can say 'no thank you' to that belief. Imagine if a car felt guilty that it needed gas... seems a bit ridiculous. Imagine if we felt guilty for needing a glass of water, sleep or food. Imagine if our kids felt guilty for asking for a snack or needing a nap or a cuddle ... would we guilt them? NO!

Try on these mindsets and take time for yourself. If you don't take care you won't be here and I am sure you want to be here as long as you can.

Love is ...

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To love with a whole heart = being in each moment fully and feeling whatever is there whether it is immense joy or immense pain. To be with others fully and be with them while they are feeling immense joy or immense pain.

To love with a whole heart = being willing to be in all of it, all of the time.

To ride of ocean waves with grace and accept the ying and yang of life for all of its beauty, learning and storms.

This is my definition. What is yours?

All we need is LOVE... 5 mindsets to nurture family

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In February, we typically only focus on the 14th but I think we could take this whole month to nurture LOVE in all its forms.

Let's start with the LOVE of FAMILY. Nobody ever said family dynamics was easy, however I have heard over and over that the best things in life are the experiences that include ups and downs.

Here are 5 mindsets that keep the focus on what matters when it comes to family:

1) Keep Connected

Investing time and energy into the relationships that matter most to us will always pay us back. When our bonds are strong most often we can survive the storms that may come our way. Every family has its drama and what I have experienced and witnessed is we can come together as a powerful unified family if we are willing to see each other and connect eye to eye.

2) Support Each Other

There are times I haven't agreed with those in my family, however I always come to the same conclusion. I will support you no matter what and I know I will get the same back. When I come from a place of respect and acceptance it most certainty serves me better than trying to will a different outcome. We are all capable humans with the ability to make a choice. I support choices even if I don't necessarily understand them.

3) Set Boundaries

I have learned that it is ok to set boundaries and stick to them. Putting our well-being first is not selfish, it is a necessary part of honoring our unique needs. I think each person has a right to set boundaries even though sometimes it may be difficult. Boundaries is LOVE.

4) Come from Compassion

None of us is perfect. I believe that everyone is doing the best they can with what they know. I have learned that I have to decide who I want to be when interacting with all people including my family. Do I want to approach situations from a place of contempt or a place of compassion. Choosing compassion always ends up being the best choice because it aligns with who I am.

5) Give each other space to grow

Who am I to determine where you 'should' be on your journey. I have learned that if I believe that we are all here for a purpose, here to learn something then who am I to get in the way of that. I am learning to let people be where they are at, without judgement or scorn. To LOVE and ACCEPT and SUPPORT is what I strive for. 

4 simple ways to create a life of joy

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What is it about the word JOY that has captivated us?

I think it represents a state of being that although can feel fleeting is an experience we all want more of. A soothing, all encompassing fill up of what matters. A simple, yet powerful little word that tends to light up the dark.... Oh JOY!

Much like a garden, we do have the capability to grow more joy in our life. Here are 4 simple tips that with a little awareness and care joy can flourish.

1) Be Grateful

When we stop and take inventory of what we are grateful for we connect to what matters in our life which automatically triggers joy. Gratitude and joy go together just like peanut butter and chocolate... hmmm chocolate, another Joy! The more time you invest in gratitude, the more you will feel joy.

2) Be Aware

We are surrounded by wonder all we have to do is look up and notice. There is a reason why the statement 'stop and smell the roses' is a classic. Just stop, notice and experience the joy of all that life has to offer us.

3) Be in Laughter

Who doesn't love a good joke, an adorable animal video or goofy children to bring a smile to our face. Joy can come in so many forms but I think laughter is to be enjoyed more often, don't you agree.

4) Be Simple

Have you heard this before: the simple life, is a joyful life. The joy of simplicity is difficult to describe without actually experiencing it. All you have to do is clean out your junk drawer and then notice the joy spread. Clutter blocks joy.