When I finally discovered my purpose, I wondered why I didn’t feel a grand sense of awe settle over me. I had always believed in the pursuit of happiness and one day I would land on it and stay there. What I quickly realized was the pursuit of happiness felt much like finding the gold at the end of a rainbow.
The reality is that I felt contentment and excitement for a time but I found myself struggling to sustain it. I started to wonder what happiness really meant for me and started to challenge what I had previously been told or experienced. There were moments where I wanted to give up on happiness and wrestled with the thoughts that maybe happiness was only reserved for certain people. I had hit a happiness rock bottom so I dusted myself off and decided that there must be something I am missing.
What became clear after much exploration with my own coaching was that I needed to shift my perspective. It became clear that searching for the pot of gold I labeled happiness was holding me back from creating the life I desired.
I realized that happiness is part of a much bigger picture. This is why I felt like I was continuously let down by life. The pursuit of happiness didn’t align with how I processed my experiences. I am a very sensitive, emotional being who feels deeply a full spectrum of emotions in life, from despair to elation.
I know I have felt moments of sadness and happiness at the same time, and each one served me. I asked myself what is bigger than being happy? The answer was being present. Happiness is just one part of living a present, fulfilled life. I started focusing more on experiencing all the colors of the rainbow rather than finding the pot of gold.
This change in perspective allowed me to appreciate all life has to offer, by experiencing what is happening right now. I no longer feel the pressure of feeling happy all the time. I can ride the ups and downs and find contentment, find peace and ease with all of it because being aware and present was the key to unlocking the kind of life I wanted to create.
I am committed to living a present life. To feeling everything fully, whether it is pain, joy or even the moments of nothingness. I am committed to being fully present with my kids, my husband, my family, friends and clients by looking into their eyes and holding their hands in life. I continually remind myself of the big picture and let go of any resistance to what is happening and let it flow.
Pursuing presence is about noticing and listening to what I need in order to stay balanced and aligned with who I am. It is about noticing when I am in need of connection with someone or in need of alone time and having the courage to express it. Presence is about accessing the now so we aren’t pulled into what was or what is about to be.
I am committed to exploring and pursuing presence. Presence is where I find my peace and you can live a present and fulfilling life by following these steps.
1) Embrace the ups along with the downs.
If you give yourself permission to feel whatever is happening right now you can move through it with grace and ease. It will help you restore balance quicker than if you resist where you are at or wish you felt differently than you do. Life is about pursuing what matter to us, learning and growing in every moment.
Allow the visceral response to your emotions. Embrace it all whether it is tears of joy or the ugly cry.
2) Notice the times of quiet contentment.
Take a minute to enjoy the moments when you feel balanced and aligned with who you are.
The time you spend in this space will grow and flourish as you learn more about how it feels and what you are doing to create it. Your mind and body will begin to naturally gravitate towards it.
3) Acknowledge and reward yourself when you shift in the moment.
Awareness is the key to personal growth and taking a moment to celebrate your milestones along the way makes every experience worth living.
Everyday is an opportunity to learn something. If we don’t reflect and celebrate our growth, we miss out on the learning that is gifted to us. Celebrating can be as simple as acknowledging awareness; it can be a quiet moment of reflection, an enthusiastic arm pump, or a warm hug with a friend. Growth and acknowledgement of it is limitless.
4) Be present. Social media isn’t the problem.
We like to blame social media or other forms of entertainment, as the reason people aren’t present in their life or with others.
There is nothing wrong with social media; the challenge is when people choose to engage with it. Prioritize your time so you can be fully present with whatever you are doing whether it is dinner with family and friends, learning a new skill or with your screen time. Choose one and make it your focus.
Living a present life is a life worth living. Happiness lives in the pursuit of presence.
One shift in perspective can change your life!